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If you are having a Celtic, Renaissance, or medieval theme wedding Handfasting is a great ritual to add to your traditional ceremony and vows. Handfasting was traditionally a simple ceremony where the bride and groom faced each other and joined right hand to right hand and left hand to left hand and were bound by a ceremonial wrap or rope. The expression of “tying the knot” came from this early Celtic marriage ritual. Later Irish, Scots, and the Welsh also adopted this ritual. Though Pagan in origin the symbolism of this ritual was so expressive it even found its way into the liturgy of some factions of Catholicism practiced in Britain after the rise of Christianity.
There are many variations on Handfasting ceremonies. Some use a single silk cord or a family clan tartan. One variation is a very detailed six corded ceremony which I will give an example of. Another variation is at the end of the ceremony the couple hold hands and jump over a branch or broom into their new life together.
You can work this ritual into your traditional wedding as long as you have an Officiate that is open to performing a handfasting or you can have a separate officiate to perform just that part of your wedding. Depending on what else you are including in your wedding ceremony you will want to find a good place to include the handfasting so everything flows smoothly. I think it best to start out with the handfasting or end with it. Ending with the handfasting is great especially if you are going to be jumping over the broom or branch together. Just take into mind jumping might be awkward if you have a very full or long dress. The last thing you want to do is fall on your face at your wedding. Finding someone to perform your wedding that is experienced with handfasting rituals is a great help. They can coordinate all aspects of your wedding to flow smoothly.
Here is one variation of a Handfasting ritual. This was the ritual my Officiate offered to perform at my wedding. This is a six cord ritual. You will need six cords. Silk is a good option. You can purchase cording from any sewing supply store. It usual comes on a roll and you can purchase it by the yard. The cords should be at least 2 feet long a piece.
The Officiate will start with:
Know now that since your lives have crossed, you have formed ties between each other. The promises you make today and the ties that are bound here will cross the years and greatly strengthen your union. With full awareness, know that you declare your intent to be handfasted before your friends and families.
The Officiate asks the bride and groom:
Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?
The bride and groom answer:
“Yes, we seek to enter”
The Officiate to the bride and groom:
I bid you look into one another’s eyes and hands the cords to the best man to hold onto to.
(When the Officiate speaks to the bride and groom, their names are to be substituted for bride and groom, for example instead of Bride, will you… it will be say, Amanda, will you…)
Bride, will you honor him? “I will”
Groom, will you honor her? “I will”
Groom and Bride, will you seek never to give cause to break that honor? “Yes”
And so the binding is made. Join your hands. (The first cord is draped across the hands)
Bride, will you share his dreams? “I will”
Groom, will you share her dreams? “I will”
Groom and Bride, will you dream together to create new realities and hopes? “Yes”
And so the binding is made. (Second cord is draped across hands)
Bride, will you share his laughter? “I will”
Groom, will you share her laughter? “I will”
Groom and Bride, will both of you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other? “Yes”
And so the binding is made. (Third cord draped across hands)
Bride, might you ever burden him? “I might” Is that your intent? “No”
Groom, might you ever burden her? “I might” Is that your intent? “No”
Groom and Bride, will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union? “Yes”
And so the binding is made. (Fourth cord is draped across the hands)
Bride, might you ever cause him pain? “I might” Is that your intent? “No”
Groom, might you ever cause her pain? “I might” Is that your intent? “No”
Groom and Bride, will you both share each other’s pain and seek to ease it? “Yes”
And so the binding is made. (Fifth cord draped across the hands)
Bride, might you ever cause him anger? “I might” Is that your intent? “No”
Groom, might you ever cause her anger? “I might” Is that your intent? “No”
Groom and bride, will you together take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union? “Yes”
And so the binding is made. (Sixth cord is draped across the hands)
The officiate hands the ceremonial book to the best man then ties the cords together and states:
The knots of this binding are not formed by these cords, but rather by your vows. For always, you hold in your own hands the making or breaking of this union.
The cords are then removed and placed on the altar. The best man gives the ceremonial book back to officiate.
This ritual can be customized to fit your needs and desires. It’s your wedding. You can even use this example and rewrite the vows to what you want them to say. I liked this particular example because it is honest and real. Might you cause pain? Yeah, it happens whether we mean it or not. It’s how you handle it afterward. It just seemed very true and fit my husband and me perfectly.
Wenona Napolitano is a freelance writer and small business owner of The Wild Rose Garden silk floral design, crafts, and handcrafted bath and body products. You can visit her at EnchantYourSenses.bravehost.com and at GardenAndHearth.com/WeddingOnABudget.htm.
© Copyright 2007 by
Wenona Napolitano
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